Petach Tikva: Election Issues

In light of my previous post, Lion of Zion asked about the issues in the upcoming municipal elections.

We will cast two ballots this Tuesday, one for the local council (27 seats) and another for mayor. This year 159,000 residents have voting rights, beginning at age 17. The incumbent mayor, Itzik Ohayon, has overseen tremendous development in the city, but the other four candidates claim his candidacy has been a bastion of corruption and cronyism. When a mayor is involved in so many decisions about building, transportation, and development, there are going to be a lot of complaints, and worse.

According to Wikipedia, Petach Tikva's population grows at an annual rate of 2.4%.

One supporter advising a storekeeper to vote for O'Hayon told me to vote for him too. "But of course you will," he added, when he noticed my religious dress. It's true that the National Religious Party (NRP or Mafdal in Hebrew) and Aguduah (Ashkenazi haredim) are supporting O'Hayon, who has close ties with the religious community.

Campaign "Ushpizin" sign for the Sukkah

When the NRP's long-time leader resigned in a surprise move, "outsider" Moti Zaft was appointed to take over. This breathed new life into the campaign, leading most of the community's rabbis, along with school principals from both the public and private religious schools, to support the party. However, a letter in our mailbox signed by "private school parents" objected to Zaft's appointment.

The NRP's main competition comes from a private individual who ran five years ago and got one seat. The NRP protested when representatives of this party known "Anachnu Maaminim bePetach Tikva" (We Believe in Petach Tikva) kept their positions in the governing body of the local NRP, despite campaigning against the party. Zaft said in an interview in the local religious paper that because of this he refused to sign a vote-exchange agreement (in which loose votes from both parties can be combined to give one of the parties an extra seat). But my son said that other parties also chose not to sign such agreements, because experts consider it poor strategy.

Every Friday and erev chag since Sukkot, cars blasted up and down the streets playing the theme song to the tune of "Anachnu maaminim bnei maaminim." My seven-year-old received the above poster outside his school, and the NRP distributed Simchat Torah flags in synagogues. At a public religious school function the head of the parents' committee reminded everyone to cast a ballot for the NRP.

A couple we know had agreed to support the leader of Anachnu Maaminim until learning that Moti Zaft, a close friend, would be running with the NRP. They found themselves in an uncomfortable position and unable to campaign for either party.

In national elections, the National Religious Party gets more votes from Petach Tikva than from any other city except for Jerusalem. The city has large secular and haredi populations as well.

As in the national political scene, the NRP has lost some power in Petach tikva. Despite the chain of daycare centers run by its women's branch Emunah, young couples did not flock to the ballot boxes in the last election. At least they didn't vote for the NRP, which received only three seats instead of the customary five. But a strong NRP is the only way to guarantee continuing support for religious Zionist education in the city.

Below are random snippets from the campaign.

• Shas is expected to do well.
• One of the liberal candidates said he would work to change the "status quo" regarding Shabbat observance. A representative of one of the religious parties responded that this was just a way to stir up trouble, as there is not enough secular power to make changes.
  
• Meretz party put up posters including a quote from a haredi newspaper, bragging that "Petach Tikva will become Bnei Brak."
• One of the five mayoral candidates is the head of the local branch of Zehavi, an organization that works to get benefits for large families. Coincidentally, his last name is Zehavi. He was active in the new law guaranteeing free library cards for all.
• One issue mentioned by several campaigns is lack of space for synagogues.
• The city lacks a religious boys' high school, as opposted to more expensive and exclusive Talmud-oriented yeshiva high schools. Many boys travel out of the city. Unfortunately a "plain" religious boys' school can quickly become a receptacle for anyone having problems in the yeshiva high schools.
• Environmental issues are getting a lot of press.
  
• Smaller parties include a women's rights party, an anti-haredi green party, a party to represent weaker neighborhoods, and one whose motto is simply to provide a "maaneh," or response, for all residents, on every subject and with every problem.

Well, you asked.

My response to Rachel

New immigrant Rachel is undergoing culture shock on behalf of her children.

A friend once told me that I do my children a grave disservice by delaying their attendance in gan until they are 3, 4 or 5. She claimed that they need the gan experience in order to develop that tough exterior so useful in Israeli society. I don't know if she's right or not, but every action involves a tradeoff. If you only associate with American families, they will not learn Hebrew as quickly nor the ins and outs of Israeli society. And Israeli culture has positive values such as love of the land, close extended families, and less materialism. Even "protektzia" is positive when you are the beneficiary.

Rachel raises three specific issues.

1. Neglect and benign abuse that are considered normal. Stick by your American standards regarding safety issues. Make sure the mother giving your kid a ride puts a seatbelt on him, and isn't planning to leave the house when he is visiting. Check who is supervising your kids' school trips and youth activities. Some parents will give you a hard time, but others will thank you even if it's only in their "hard" (as my 4yo puts it). Schools are allowed to release kids after 12:45 (not sure from what age, but definitely upper elementary grades) without notifying the parents. Your kids have to know what to do in that situation.
   
2. Junk food. I've gathered that junk food is also a huge problem in the US. I've given up this battle for the most part, I'm sorry to say. My first-grader's classmates are constantly reminded not to bring junk, but the quantity given out at school makes up for this. I still control what I buy, but not always what comes into the house. My 4yo told a playgroup mother that we had had homemade pareve ice cream with food coloring and chemicals on Shabbat. In reality, a guest had brought cookies filled with colored gel. My kids know what's healthy and why we don't buy certain things.
   
3. Manners. When we see others push into line, we can explain to our children how it feels to be pushed and the prohibition against "gezel zman" (stealing the time of others). Saying thank you and you're welcome is important. However, our ultimate goal is for children to feel gratitude and be sensitive to others. I don't insist that my children use these words, but hope they will follow my example. And they generally do. But that is more about my parenting approach than cultural difference.
   

Here are more tips on keeping kids close.

• Send them to gan as late as possible. Less junk food and bullying, fewer parent meetings and birthday parties--what more could you want?
• Look for like-minded parents, including Israeli ones. Find people who will teach you about the system, in order to understand and influence it.
  
• Focus on the positive--both in your children and in Israeli life. Israel has improved in many areas such as safety awareness and handicapped access.
  
• Limit the amount of time your kids spend with friends and get to know the parents. Remember that just because someone is American doesn't mean they have the same values and standards as you.
  
• Invest time in building up a support network for your family.
• Depending on where you live, you may be exposed to a much wider variety of cultural experiences and mindsets than you were in the US. The parents who are unaware of safety issues may have grown up in a home where those issues were not on the radar screen.
  
• Limit time spent in gan, daycare and afterschool programs, hugim (afterschool activities), and youth groups, and stay on top of what happens there.
  
• Let your kids know why you do things differently, without criticizing other parents. Their approaches may be valid, especially in a different cultural system.
  
• Be realistic and avoid stereotypes. Are kids in American dayschools always welcoming to new kids? Do teachers always have complete control of the class? Do all American parents put their kids in seatbelts every single time?
  
• Teach children to respect their own individuality and that of others. Give them the confidence to withstand negative social pressure.
  

One of those parenting dilemmas

A neighbor once offered to take care of my baby when I went out. "Don't worry," she assured me. "His crying won't bother me." Since I don't ignore crying babies whether they are mine or not, I didn't agree to watch the neighbor's baby the next couple of times she asked me. I might have enjoyed a reciprocal arrangement, but only if the neighbor shared my parenting style. And I didn't want to provide daycare.

I am finding myself in a similar situation now. My four-year old and I pick up my first-grader, Y, from school each day. On the way home we enjoy a snack in the park, where Y unwinds and tells me about his day. Afterward, the kids play in the nearly empty playground; they've missed each other. I bring along a book or just soak in the "winter" weather.

The other day a boy in my son's class, B, joined us on our walk home. When he realized we were going to the park, he stuck around. He stayed until we left half an hour later, and continued walking with us in the direction of our homes.

Y is not friendly with B, but I happened to meet his mother at the parent-teacher conference. She and her husband own a store, and she has another job besides. I asked her how B gets home, because I had once noticed him wandering around the neighborhood after school. She said that his older brother, who usually finishes school later, takes him home. She said something about B visiting the toy store sometimes.

When I got to school the next afternoon Y was standing with B, who informed me that he was coming to the park with us. I could hardly say no. At the park he told me about his very rich father, how thin cellphones like his are much better than the kind I have, and how his 12yo brother takes a taxi to the parents' store to work there after school, leaving him alone and bored at home. He said that he has a housekey and lets himself in after school. I have no idea how much of this is accurate. He kept asking us when we were leaving the park, and when I said not yet, B left by himself. I didn't want to walk home with him again. Y said that he saw B walk back toward the school, perhaps to meet his brother. If he has to wait for 45 minutes for his brother anyway, I can see why he might prefer the park to the schoolyard.

No one seems to wonder where he is during the hour after school lets out. The thin cellphone never rang. My husband said I should call the mother, but I don't see the point. If he is supposed to be in the schoolyard during those 45 minutes, then she can tell him that he has to stay on school grounds. But if he's supposed to walk home by himself, is it my place to tell her to make sure he goes straight home? Especially to an empty house? And what if he goes against her instructions?

It's not B's fault that he is neglected on his own during the afternoon. He needs warmth and an adult presence. But he's not an orphan, and I'm not a daycare provider. Our school, on the other hand, provides afterschool daycare. Y enjoys the company of B, who is a bit of a clown, but my four-year-old did not appreciate someone else taking Y's attention. And I will cease to enjoy our time in the park if B attaches himself to us every day.

Tomorrow my daughter asked me to come straight home after school, because she will return early with a friend. Maybe if I don't stop in the park for the next few days, B will forget about my family's routine. I'm open to other suggestions.

Update: I told the school counselor that I had seen B wandering around the neighborhood after school. I suggested that he might be better off in the afterschool program. She seemed concerned and promised to look into it. I also mentioned that Y was much happier and she said, "I know."